But the real reason I’ve been spurred to write this morning is due to a story I just saw on Good Morning America.

I’m not normally a morning show watcher (GMA or any others), but they caught my interest this morning when they previewed a piece on Twitter they were going to do. Being a big fan of Twitter, I naturally was interested to hear what they were going to say (they think Twitter’s great, by the way).

But then Twitter wasn’t all that attracted my attention. They went on to discuss a dating compatibility tool that uses – get this – DNA.

That’s right my fellow singletons – for just $99 you can give GenePartner a swab of DNA from your cheek and have them run their tests to provide you with your given genetic compatibility with others looking for that “special someone”.

Hm.

GMA went and followed a couple on their first date where they had them do their DNA testing before having dinner. The results were then revealed on GMA this morning with the couple sitting in the studio. This particular couple came out with a 90% match which only seemed to solidify what they had already discovered from their date. So they already knew they liked each other. If this couple had been doing this on their own, this means that they’d have spent $99 to find out what they already knew.

A few things about this make me uneasy, but I’ll just share a couple of them.

First, what if it had gone the other way? What if they’d be out on the date, liked each other, but then the DNA results came back to say that they weren’t genetically compatible. That alone may not have been enough for them call it quits right away, but I can’t help but feel like knowing that in the back of their minds wouldn’t undermine their possible relationship. Think about it – what if you were married, engaged, or even seriously dating someone and you and your partner decided to do this DNA compatibility testing for kicks and it came back that you weren’t genetically compatible. How much would that suck?

Another thing that troubles me about this is it further shows what I see as a burgeoning trend among our single society to run after so-called scientific methods of finding your “perfect match.” While I’m far more inclined to listen to what a psychologist would say about the kind of man who would be good for me, I still would rather leave it up to my friends, family, and God to bring me the right guy across my path.

And maybe that’s the difference. Maybe in the absence of a belief and trust in God to hook me up with the man I should be with, scientific methods work as a substitute. They certainly seem far more concrete than what many see as an ambiguous God who surely has far more important matters to attend to than finding me a date for the weekend, right? Or maybe some of the motivation stems from the GenX-ers fear of divorce. We are the first real generation of divorce, after all… Perhaps as a result of that, we’re searching for new ways of making sure the one we pick is the right one for us – after all, who really goes into a relationship wanting to divorce? Perhaps those from broken homes think that they can avoid this fate if they have enough unbiased, third-party input into selecting their mate. I’m totally speculating here, but there might be something to that…

I’m not trying to say that some of these scientific approaches couldn’t help…God is the master scientist, after all. At the very least these types of tests and things can probably teach you something about yourself that you may not have already known which is certainly valuable.

eharmony, for example, has an interesting personality test that it uses to find your matches for you. So while eHarmony failed to match me up successfully with anyone in the 6 years (and hundreds of dollars) I spent with them, I still found the personality test output interesting. And, while some of the matches they sent me were dogs, there were some good guys as well. Of course the ones I liked never called me back… If we’d had a DNA test in hand that said we were genetically compatible, would that have changed anything? I doubt it. We had eHarmony’s endorsement that we were compatible from a personality standpoint and clearly that wasn’t enough.

The fact is, you either feel it or you don’t and no amount of scientific testing or results can change that. All it can really do is potentially affirm a choice you’ve already made, but I don’t think it can make you try against your gut reaction. I speak from experience on this one.

So maybe this makes me naive, but after all the online dating I’ve done over the past decade, I’ve come to the conclusion that at the end of the day, I would rather put my faith and trust in the God of the universe to take care of my needs – emotional or otherwise.

Therein lies my dilemma.

The gazelle in me says “Make Dave Ramsey proud – throw it at the debt!”  But then there’s the other part of me that looks at a chunk of unfinished items that also need to be addressed in my home and wonders if I shouldn’t siphon off some of that money to cover a few of them.

This is really tough for me because all I really want to do is pay off those stupid credit cards… Then again, some of these things aren’t exactly luxuries.  Sigh.

I’ll be having my monthly budget meeting with Shanna in a few weeks, but in the meantime as I’m thinking through this stuff, I thought some of you might be willing to give me your two cents.

The open items requiring money are:

• Downstairs Baseboards ($?) – These were left undone after my wood floors were put in and need to be completed.
• Bed ($600…?) – I hate my bed.  I’ve suffered with it for 2 years and don’t think I can really take much more.
• Kitchen floor ($?) – Also left undone after the wood floors were installed.  Needs to be tiled and sealed.
• Patio door ($1,000+) – This is an issue because the current patio door is leaking in heavy rain which seeps in at the foundation and will ruin my wood floors if not corrected.
• Upstairs bathroom ($?) – Disgusting.  I’ve dealt with it for 3 years, but it has a mildewy smell and needs to be gutted.
• Landscaping/patio installation ($3,000) – I’ll get into this more in a minute, but essentially it’s extra living space and a chance to clean up someone else’s terrible mess that I inherited when I bought the place.

In thinking through the priority of said items, I think for me it goes something like this:

1. Kitchen floor
2. Patio door
3. Downstairs Baseboards
4. Bed
5. Landscaping
6. Upstairs bathroom

Now I know that the landscaping thing is the most expensive by far except for the bathroom, probably, but it would be so great to have that done.

In order to understand why this is a priority for me, you’d have to know that today both my backyard & front yard are an absolute mess.  There are 6-foot tall weeds growing along the side of my back fence which I have been unable to get rid of.  The rest of the “planting boxes” (for lack of a better way to describe the crummy brick boarder around the yard) are full of jungle-like vegetation during the warmer months of the year that all but threaten to overthrow the yard itself and displace me from my home.  The yard itself floods easily which makes for a real swamp in the rain.  There’s nowhere to sit or do anything outside right now which is something I really love when the weather’s nice.  The front of the house has a large, barren garden with 2 dying bushes in it.  The fence on the front porch is rotten.  There is a built-up garden area to one side of the porch which has rotten railroad ties which are falling down.  In short, it’s just awful.  I would love to have a place where I could sit in the front or the back.  In a small townhouse like I have, any extra living space is a big deal, and my yards are the only additional living space options I have.

Basically, I know I could spend away all of the extra funds I’ll be seeing in the next couple of months if I’m not careful, but I don’t necessarily think it’s a bad idea to use that money to cover even a few of these things.  Say, maybe items 1-5.  Part of what makes it difficult is that I don’t know exactly how much most of those things will cost, although I suspect the kitchen floor will only be a few hundred, and the baseboards will not be that much either.

So I can either pay off my remaining credit cards completely, or get some items in my home completed and I have no idea what to do.  Of course it also doesn’t help that I don’t know how much my bonus will be yet either – we’ll find that out closer to the end of this month.  This will certainly have an impact on my decision here as well.

Thoughts anyone?  The lines are open.

In this world nothing is certain but death and taxes.
- Benjamin Franklin

In our present society, one might almost think that this famous quote by one of my favorite founding fathers could be reworded to replace “death” with “debt”.  It is staggering how in such a relatively short amount of time, we have managed to rearrange our finances and priorities into a place where our economy relies so heavily on debt that if everyone were to stop using it, our economy would essentially collapse.  Yikes.  Of course that would never happen – there are way too many people and way too many credit cards, but it’s still a frightening reality when you think about it in those terms.

However, if we all were to get on board with the likes of Dave Ramsey (and others) and slowly migrated ourselves out of debt and instead focused on building wealth and giving, our economy would be way stronger than it is now.  Imagine a world where there are no credit cards, no interest payments, no fees & penalties, no foreclosures, no repossessions…  Well, maybe someday.  I am, however, beginning to be able to imagine my own life in those terms.

I’m coming up on a year since starting my Dave Ramsey plan, cut up my credit cards, and began a whole new way of financial living.  Have I missed my credit cards?  Not once.  My starter emergency fund has been more than sufficient to carry me through a few minor unexpected expenses which have come up over the course of the year.  I have made sacrifices, changed habits, and have been the subject of a lot of teasing – not by my friends, but mostly by my coworkers.  It seems that many people believe that the only reason the whole budget-thing works for me is because I’m single with no kids (although I do have a dog and while I’m sure she’s not as costly as a kid, she still isn’t cheap  by any means!)  “It’s totally different when you have a wife and family,” one of my colleagues had said.  I didn’t respond since it was clear he didn’t “get it” and I didn’t want to get into a debate, but what I wanted to point out to him is that solid financial principles and teaching are only solid if they work across the board for everyone, regardless of your marital status or family-size.  I know my fellow debt-free crusaders understand me on this point – there’s quite a few of you out there with blogs that tell of your respective journeys…most of whom, might I add, are married with kids:  Debt Free 2009, My Personal Debt Free Journal, and many of the blogs off of the Snowflake Revolution web site to name a few.  I’m just saying.

Moving right along…

Now that we’re past Christmas and New Years, the next thing that begins to occupy my thoughts is tax season.  Tax time begins rearing its ugly head in January and the insanity usually builds until we hit April 15th.  April 15th also happens to be one of my cousin Aubrynn’s birthday.  Poor kid.  Thankfully she’s still too young to know what a stressful deadline date that is for most people, but hopefully the fact that it’s her birthday will serve to add some joy to that otherwise annoying day.

Anyhow, in general I have not minded tax season because it usually means money in my pocket.  I’ve often been told that I must be doing something wrong if I’m always getting money back after paying thousands into the hands of the IRS all year, but I do my best to estimate out my “real” tax liability for the year and so keep more money in my paychecks while still giving the IRS what I should.

Last year I failed miserably at this and ended up with a $8K+ refund.  Oops.  This year I’ve been dreading doing my taxes because I was CERTAIN I was going to owe.  Big.  Like $4K or so at least which made me nervous…not because I can’t pay it (budgeting works, I’m tellin’ ya!) but because I just would far rather use that money for good (pay off debt) than evil (give it to the IRS).   So why the liability?  Earlier in 2008, I had converted a traditional IRA to a Roth.  What I didn’t do was consider the tax implications of this.  Later I realized that I may have just thrown myself directly into the path of an oncoming tax bill.  Major oops.

In my great journey to become debt free, any extra money I bring in serves to bring me closer to that goal.  The thought of having to use some (or even all) of my bonus check to cover a stupid tax liability absolutely burned me up.  And then to add massive insult to critical injury, the market tanked AFTER the conversion so if I had converted in December, let’s say, my tax liability would have been less than half of that estimated $4K.  Fabulous.

The good news is I think I may have found a way to fix it…

As I began my yearly TurboTax Online interview, I did a little investigating and discovered that my mistake is not without recourse.  I can actually undo this.  It’s called a “recharacterization” and I as long as I submit the paperwork and complete the recharacterization before April 15, it’ll be like the conversion never happened!  30 days after that, if I want to reconvert it, I can but with the much much much lower account value.  Score…although I’m not sure I’ll bother.  This has been such a hassle and the IRA isn’t really worth that much so I might be better off just leaving it alone.

Anyway, so if I do all this and erase my tax liability, this also means that I’ll be getting back at least a couple grand which I can throw back at the debt!  (This is also great because it might help to make up for the decrease in bonus I’ll most likely be looking at for this year).

Oh, and on that note, I should mention that I managed to pay off another credit card yesterday!  This is a HUGE deal for me since it’s the first debt payoff I’ve been able to make happen in 6 months, so I’m pretty excited.  Party on Wayne.  This was my Best Buy card which I had used under a 0% for 2 years interest deal to purchase my fridge & dishwasher.  The 0% interest promotion was good though mid-April and by paying it off now, I saved myself from having to contend with $858 in deferred finance charges!  Exciting stuff…and yes, I probably do need to get out more.

So I’m now down to only 2 credit cards with balances left – one with no interest until August, and the other with 10.99%.  I should have the interest-bearing one paid off easily with the tax refund I’ll now be getting and/or bonus (whichever comes in first).  And who knows, if my bonus is hefty enough, I may even be able to kill off the other one by the end of March leaving me to tackle my car loan next…and, might I add, WAY ahead of schedule!

Part of my excitement in all this is that since I’ve not been able to actually pay anything off in awhile, I am feeling a lot of renewed vigor with all these potential upcoming wins which serve to bring me that much closer to my ultimate goals…and will give me more flexibility to move as God leads.  I’m still probably looking at another 24 months before I can call Dave Ramsey and scream over the radio, but it’s all about those baby steps!

2009 looks to be off to a running start…and away we go!

Here’s the Reader’s Digest version as best as I can tell it…

I am (or was?) going out to Seattle to help Janelle & Sean with some logistical issues that cropped up last minute which were potentially going to keep them going on their long-overdue honeymoon.  I am of course MORE than happy to help them out – the only hurdle being…you guess it…work.

Rather than being forced to take a week & a half vacation time off work, it struck me that there really is no reason I couldn’t just work while I’m there.  After all, my friends wouldn’t be around so I would have flexible scheduling during the day with early mornings & evenings free.  Practically tailor-made time for getting stuff done!

Now here’s the rub: Major events taking place in our department this month which include a big project on the table that I’ve been placed in charge of threaten my ability to be as flexible and mobile as I might otherwise be.  (Figures)

This was also something I did not foresee when originally posed with the question last Monday which was in the middle of All Things Christmas and therefore there was no discussion to be had about it in the office until all management returned from their respective vacations.

I did bring it up to management first thing yesterday. I brought it up again at the end of the day. Both times being met with a, “Let me think about it” response. If I hadn’t already been teetering on the edge of insanity, that just about pushed me over.

Time was becoming increasingly important in terms of being able to get a ticket and work out all of the other logistics.  To say I was a little antsy would be the first major understatement of 2009.  I hate feeling like I have no control over decisions like this in my own life.  But the truth is that, unless you work for yourself (which I plan to someday!) your employer really does own your time in many ways.

So then today I re-approached the situation with the intent of expressing the need for a “best guess” decision since a plane ticket was riding on the response. I proposed two options my favorite being where they would approve me working remotely until Tuesday (2/3) when Sean & Jel returned where I could then take off the rest of the week and so get some visiting time in before coming home myself.  The other option was that I would not work, but would then need to leave the same day S&J returned so I could be back in the office by Wednesday, 2/4.

Earlier this afternoon I got my answer:  Neither.  Instead, they would approve me to work remotely for one week, but no more – I would need to be back in the office on Monday, 2/2.

The good news is that this was a major exception they were making for me – they wouldn’t even consider approving such a request for most other people in part because they trust me and my ability to get everything done that I needed to do. Naturally it’s still not the optimum situation – I’d much rather stay and get a couple of days with S&J before having to come home. With this alternative, I won’t even see them at all…MAJOR bummer.

Anyway, we’re still living with one foot in the Land of Limbo because it seems there may be one other alternative which would potentially preclude me from needing to go out there at all. I’m okay either way – at least I know where I stand with work now…and, at the end of the day, this was all about helping my friends and so whatever works best for them is what I’m in favor of.

Of course if I don’t go at all, then I would also say that this should buy me some extra time during my next trip during our 4th Annual Labor Day Seattle Extravaganza.

So despite the last couple of days being such a rollercoaster ride, the hardest part of the waiting is over and we should have everything completely ironed out soon.

Tell the fat lady she’s on in five.

New Year’s Day…now is the accepted time to make your regular annual good resolutions.  Next week you can begin paving hell with them as usual.  – Mark Twain

Well 2009 is off to a fantastic start. Yesterday was dull. Today is duller (if that were even possible). I was going to go to S’s for dinner tonight and then go see The Curious Case of Benjamin Button but alas, she had to cancel and so now I’m doing nada.  I’ll probably stay in and watch more of The Food Network.  You laugh, but I’m dead serious.  I’ve been a little food-obsessed since being sick last week.  It would seem that my body does not recover quickly from stomach-related illnesses, so I can’t eat anything right now outside of Jell-O, bread, water, and broth.  As a result, I’ve taken to eating vicariously through others.  I’ve been watching hours upon hours of The Food Network…Big Daddy’s House, Rachael Ray, Iron Chef…you name it, I’m watching it and salivating over everything on the screen.  In addition, I’ve been actually reading my recipe books and making lists of all the wonderful sounding dishes I’m going to whip up when I’m able to eat again.  It’s like Jim Gaffigan says – when you’re hungry, The Food Network is like porn.

So crazy food obsession aside, right now I feel like I’m in a holding pattern. It’s Friday, but it’s a weird Friday because yesterday the office was closed and so most [sane] people took today off. I was originally supposed to have it off as well, but due to the possible Seattle venture later this month, I felt it was more wise to not use up any vacation I didn’t absolutely have to take. See, I got a message from Jel & Sean on Monday – they’re set to finally go on their honeymoon, but their plans for the care of their kids fell through at the last minute. They exhausted all resources on their end and then came to see if I would consider coming out to Seattle to watch the kids for the last portion of their honeymoon trip. I would love to, of course – their kids are awesome, and they’re practically family to me, so I would do whatever it took to help them out. The only catch is that I can’t really afford to use up all of that time as vacation. I sent an email to AD to see if he would consider letting me work remotely as an alternative. There’s really no reason why I couldn’t – I won’t have anything else to do when I’m not watching KJ or running Z around, so it would be a great opportunity to shake up a dreary winter and help out my friends. Thing is, I just don’t know what he’s going to say.

I have never asked for flexibility to this extent, so I’m hoping that he’ll be cool with it. However, every once in awhile he’s surprised me by not being okay with something that I think he will be. I’m trying not to worry about it, but it’s hard… After all, I’m having to wait a week to hear his response so the suspense has been building and building and building. I feel like I’m in some horror movie with high-pitched violin music in the background waiting for an axe-weidling Jack Nicholson to come flying at me from around the next corner.  It could happen.

I also am having an I’m-so-sick-of-my-life-I-can-hardly-stand-it moment today. You know the kind – where I’m wishing I was anywhere but here.  Some of it is I’m sure brought on by the stress I’m feeling over not knowing what will happen at work on Monday.  Some of it is tied into the promotion thing which I’m still steamed about.  Some of it is the weather.  Some of it is how insanely morgue-like it’s been in the office this past week.  Some of it is my unfinished kitchen floor.  Some of it is my missing baseboards.  Some of it is my hideous backyard.  Some of it is my hair which I just couldn’t get to look quite right this morning.  And some of it is just my insatiable hunger for change that I do not see being fulfilled any time in the foreseeable future.

I have a headache, I’m cold, I’m tired, and I was told I could leave at 2, but alas I personally am stuck here until at least 4.  Sigh.  I had this Chicken Noodle Soup in a Bread Bowl from Panera for lunch.  The soup was way creamier than I would have expected for what traditionally has been a broth soup, and then combined with the bread (which I think has expanded in my stomach to roughly the size of Japan), I’m finding myself to be uncomfortably full now.

I guess you could say that I’m not really having the best day.

I know, I know…it’s a new year full of hope and promise and doves and pixie dust. Well not in my narcotic-free world…and the rest of you should stop doing drugs if you’re seeing doves and pixie dust.

New Years actually ignored me this year.  Literally.   I completely missed midnight.   I was talking to Jel on the phone and we hung up while there were still 7 minutes on the clock for 2008.  Next time I looked at the clock, the one on the stand said midnight, but apparently it was slow because the one on the cable box said 12:03.  So I unknowingly christened in 2009 with ice water while watching Iron Chef America.   Exciting stuff.  No New Year’s kiss (when was the last time I was kissed anyway?  2005, but 1998 was my last Near Years kiss I think…that’s awfully sad), no champagne, no pomp, no circumstance…practically no New Years at all.

So I officially have skipped the holidays this year.   I refuse to believe that Christmas happened because I was so sick that I virtually have no memory of it, and now after being snubbed by New Years, I think perhaps the better position to take is that there were no holidays this year – they just didn’t happen.

I suppose I could use this time to document my 2009 New Year resolutions, but how can I document resolutions for a year that snuck in like some sort of deviant ashamed to come to the front door?  Do I really want to encourage that behavior?  Well, I guess regardless of how it arrived, 2009 is actually here, so I should at least acknowledge its presence with some sort of list of things to accomplish over the next 12 months, so here we go…

2009 New Year Resolutions

1. Finish off my debt (at least everything but house-related)
2. Get back into shape (something that has been severely lacking since leaving NYC also)
3. Formulate a 5-year plan (this seems appropriate since I’ll be 35 this year and would like to have something sorted out for where I’ll be when I’m 40)
4. Partake in 2009′s holiday season since I missed out on 2008
5. Cook at least one new recipe at home each week.

So that’s it for this year…  I don’t like to go too crazy with resolutions – would rather keep them smaller and therefore things that could actually be achieved which is why “Climb Everest” didn’t make the list this year.

What are your New Years resolutions?

When in doubt, blog.

Thankfully I have the day off tomorrow so that once the caffeine wears off, I’ll be able to sleep in and not skip a beat.  Speaking of tomorrow (which is really technically today) I should give a shout out to Janelle & Sean whose 1-year anniversary is the 23rd!  Seems like yesterday that we were all standing on that yacht on Lake Washington as vows were said and they began their happily ever after.  Wow.  How’d that go by so quickly?  Well, I don’t really want to contemplate the passing of time, so instead I’ll just say HAPPY ANNIVERSARY JEL & SEAN!  LOVE YOU GUYS!

So what else is there to say?  What worthless tidbits of news can I dig up to share?  Not much has been going on to speak of… Oh, I fell down the stairs on Thursday.  I slipped on the carpet in my socks while talking to my sister on the phone.  I then proceeded to tumble down about two-thirds of the staircase on my ass which now has a bruise the size of Rhode Island.  That’s one for the record books.  Once I came to a complete stop, I couldn’t decide whether to laugh or cry.  I think I laughed, but since I’m still in pain now several days later, crying might be more apt.  Thankfully I’m not over 60 or I might have broken something.  In any case, it was an act of sheer grace & poise which surely would have qualified me for a gold medal if tumbling down stairs was an Olympic sport.  Maybe someday it will be.

Work is slow now that we’re nearing the end of the year.  We had our annual team Christmas party at AD’s house tonight which was fun as always.  The Yankee exchange gift time proved to be…well, interesting.  This year turned out some weird gifts including an illustrated children’s book on Obama and a “Control Your Woman Remote Control” – and guess who ended up the evening with that little gem.  What I’m going to do with it, I have no idea but I am determined to find a good use for it.

Aside from the odd gift assortment, we had a nice time eating, drinking, and visiting.  I find in general that these parties bring out another side to everyone…  Partly I think because we’re all out of the office and therefore not bound by all of the office etiquette that typically rules our interactions.  With this letting down of the guard, strange tales (some from far off lands) emerge as well.

For example, one of our new team members made a comment about how he had been robbed while in Spain.  The conversation went something like this:

“How did you get robbed in Spain?  Did you fall for the old banana-in-the-tailpipe?”
“No, I was swimming in the ocean at 2 a.m…”
“And someone mugged you IN the ocean?”
“Not quite…  They took my wallet and my pants which I had left on the shore.”
“I’m not really sure I would call that being ‘robbed’ – sounds more like ‘finders, keepers’ to me.”

I’m afraid the above loses something in translation being typed out, but it was really funny in the moment – trust me.

The evening ended with some unbelievable chocolate cake (which I’m quite sure I’m already sporting on my hips) followed by a bunch of the guys demonstrating their skill (or lack thereof) at Guitar Hero III for Wii.  Having just acquired my Wii not even a week ago, I’m not exactly well-versed yet on all of the available games, but after seeing it, I might be persuaded to try out that one…  It had some good tunes and apparently the less you know about actual guitar playing, the better at the game you’ll be so I should totally rock the stage then.

Speaking of my Wii, can I just say that I LOVE IT!  Really.  It’s my new favorite thing.  3 days of playing tennis and I could barely move my arms.  And apparently my Wii Fit has a lot to say about my current weight, balance, and other aspects of my physique and what I should be working towards…  It’s a little cheeky, if you ask me, but I’m not about to argue with a machine.

How long does it take caffeine to wear off?  Anyone know?  I wonder if there’s anything I can do to expedite its departure from my system.  Nothing like being exhausted but unable to sleep…  And then poor Chena is along for the ride because if I’m up, then really so is she.

Right, so maybe I should give bed another shot.  I’m finished trying to find something useful to do in the wee small hours of the morning anyway.  Maybe I should just read this post again after I publish…  It might just bore me to sleep.

So good night…I hope.

Crisp & cold, Saturday was thankfully sunny and lacking in precipitation. Took me about 2 hours to reach Kim’s hotel, and we then headed over to Intercourse (I feel dirty just typing that) for lunch.

Intercourse, PA.  So the Amish are not as pure & wholesome as they’d like us to think.  And can I just say that the town itself totally capitalizes on the whole inappropriateness of its name.  Slogans like the one from the pretzel factory where you can get ‘em “Soft or Hard” litter the billboards. It’s like a dirty marketer’s dream. I felt like I needed a shower upon leaving.

Anyhow, we met up with Beck (my friend, not the band) at Kitchen Kettle Village for lunch at the Kling House Restaurant (not to be confused with a Klingon restaurant). Afterwards, I took Kim back to the hotel for the wedding while Beck & I headed to Lititz where we grabbed Len, et. al and b-lined it for Hershey.

After much traffic, we arrived, parked, and were ready to enter when much to our dismay, discovered that the previously admission-free Candylane was charging nearly $10 per person! Apparently Hershey wasn’t satisfied with just making the money you’d spend once you entered. Right on, Hershey Corporate Decision-Makers. Way to increase people’s expenses in an already struggling economy! Good call. Really. (Can you see the sarcasm oozing off my words?)

Anyway, the fee included children, which meant to walk through Candylane in what we could stand of the freezing cold would have cost us nearly $70. Um…PASS!

So the kids were disappointed…heck, I was disappointed…but for that much money, we really had no choice. Boo Hershey.

Regardless, it was a fun few hours of driving around, and I’m glad I got to hang out with my friends who I haven’t seen in far too long.

I did manage to capture a few pics from the outside of the park and Hershey’s Chocolate World before we left, so here they are. I apologize that there aren’t more, but I’m giving you what I’ve got and so you’ll just have to make do:

That, in a nutshell, was my weekend. Oh, I guess there was just one more little thing…

I GOT A Wii!!

Yes, that’s right… After much deliberation and a full consultation with my Budget Committee, it was decided that I should get myself a Wii for Christmas. Partially for the gym membership dollars it will save me, and partially because I calculated out that by the end of 2008, I will have paid off just over $40K in debt this year!!

Now anyone who has gotten (or has tried to get) a Wii during Christmas shopping season might be wondering how I managed to obtain said Wii. Well, I had to get God involved. So I prayed. I told God I knew it was a silly thing, but that I really wanted a Wii for Christmas. I told Him I wanted the Wii Fit too, but would be happy with just a Wii.

I looked online. Everyone was sold out. I combed the stores (including while I was out in Lancaster) to no avail. Every place informed me that any time they got Wii’s in their stock shipments, they’d be sold out almost instantly. People would be waiting outside the stores before they opened in the mornings just hoping for a Wii. They said it was no different for the Wii Fit.

One store told me that the only way to get one would be to call during the week when their shipment comes in to see if any have arrived and then to come over immediately to get it. Since I work and have no one else to run my errands, this was not a valid option.

The odds of getting one by Christmas were looking increasingly unlikely. Then came Sunday night.

I was online flipping through Amazon (which I had done a thousand times before) and I decided to go check the Wii page (which I had done at least a hundred times before) when what to my wondering eyes should appear but a miniature sleigh, and eight tiny reindeer!  Wait…that’s not right.  Let me back up…

The Amazon page must have JUST refreshed its inventory because to my wondering eyes appeared AVAILABLE Wiis!! So I snagged one. They were sold out again within an hour or so and I haven’t seen the page restocked since. Ha ha!

Then Monday morning I had a similar tale where I managed to grab a Wii Fit off Best Buy online. They restocked, I got it. They were sold out within about 15 minutes and haven’t restocked since. Another ha ha!

So I got my Wii AND my Wii Fit. But wait, there’s more! They’ll both be arriving BEFORE Christmas!! Merry Christmas indeed!

Yay! Or should I say, Wii!

This week has been one of dinner guests, coffee dates, committee meetings, and haircuts. I have been home each evening for a total of about 1 hour before having to rush back out again only to return at bedtime.

I am completely wiped out…and it’s not over.

Tonight I have a release with work that I’m testing which I hope will not run into the wee hours of the morning (as they are sometimes prone to do). Tomorrow, it’s up early, weigh-in at Weight Watchers, and then hitting the ol’ westbound highway – destination: Lancaster.

I’m looking forward to a day in Lancaster for a few reasons:

1. It’s been far too long since I’ve visited…going on 5 years.
2. It’s Christmastime, so everything should be uber-pretty.
3. I’ll be coming home with chocolate – Wilbur’s (famous for its Buds) & Hershey’s (just plain famous).

As to the “why” behind this visit, my reasons are many…and no, the Amish is not one of them. Contrary to popular belief, Lancaster County is not the only place where the Amish live. If I wanted to see them, I’d just go to the local Amish farmers market which is only a couple of miles from my house. Granted, there aren’t that many buggies running around my area, but that’s probably for the best. Bucks County is pretty, but grossly lacking horse-and-buggy-friendly road systems – not to mention drivers. It’s sad really, but I digress.

Rather, I’m going to Lancaster to kill a few different birds with one blunt object.

One of my former NYC roommates, Kim, is going to be there for a wedding. She’s actually arriving out there today, but with the wedding not being until tomorrow night, she’s got the whole day free to hang. Additionally, one of my childhood friends, Becky, and her family recently returned to the Lancaster area from Virginia. Beck has agreed to come down and meet Kim and me for lunch and some shopping around Lancaster. Then, while Kim is at the wedding, I’m going to take a short road trip with Beck & Co. out to Hershey Park to see the lights. And hey, who can turn down going to a place where the air itself smells of chocolate?

After Hershey and the wedding, Kim will come home with me, and then I’ll throw her on a train back to the city on Sunday after church.

So it’ll be a action-packed weekend which is befitting the preceding week…however, if I’m being honest, I have to admit that I’d really like some crashing time – but I guess that’ll just have to wait until [hopefully] Sunday night.

Here’s hoping I haven’t jinxed myself by saying that.

I’m taking the camera so will hopefully get some good pictures – especially of Hershey and the lights…and maybe I’ll score a shot of a buggy for all you Amish fanatics.

I know, I know – there’s no rule that if someone befriends me, I have to accept. In fact, Facebook has been kind enough to not notify someone if I choose to ignore a friend request. It also doesn’t send any sort of notification if I decide to remove someone I previously accepted. Great. Thanks Facebook. But that doesn’t quite take away the fact that these people are still out there and, if they were to find me, could still send me messages whether I respond to them or not…and I’m not the kind of person who can easily ignore a message.

So what brought this on?

One of the curses of being tall is that cooking (or doing dishes) at standard-height counter tops will eventually kill your lower back. Mine now kills (man, am I getting old). While I’m waiting for it to stop spazzing out like it’s being attacked, the activities available to me are somewhat limited. Naturally sitting in an ergonomic chair at the computer is one of the least painful, and lends itself to doing things like surfing around on Facebook.

So today I found myself perusing Facebook specifically looking to see if any of my exes (particularly the one who is more prone to stalker-like behavior) have joined up. So far, I’ve been lucky. My goal is mainly to block them once they do (you can’t block someone on Facebook until they join). However today while hunting for one of them, I stumbled across a whole group of people who I knew outside of school during those years between 16-18, or as I affectionately call them, “The Dark Years”. I was actually considering adding some of the journal entries from those days as blog posts, but upon reading through them, they were so dismal and unsettling, that I decided it was best they never see the light of the Internet.

Those were the years of my life that I recognize for their importance in shaping me to be who I am today, but were still years I’d rather not relive, revive, resurrect, or apply any sort of smelling salts to. Sure, they were key in making me who I am, but I am also in no way the same person today that I was then…and may I just say, THANK GOD FOR THAT!

Okay, fine. So don’t add any of these people to your Facebook friends then. Simple, right? Wrong. So wrong and so not that simple. While looking through this chunk of people that I have not seen, spoken to, nor heard from in nearly 17 years, there are some (2 to be exact) that I would actually like to reconnect with.

I know, that seems to go against everything I was just saying about that particular group of people, but these two are different. They weren’t part of the darkness in the same way I feel the others were. They didn’t ride on the backs of hellhounds when we would meet and hang out. Rather, they are people who I have wondered about, thought of, and even searched for on occasion. The problem is that this whole group – Dementors and all – are connected on Facebook (which I actually think is a little creepy). Therefore, if I connect with one of them, I open myself up to being connected to all (or having to explain why not).

I know I don’t owe them any explanation or anything else, for that matter, but to ignore them if they were to reach out, would just seem mean…and I’m not mean. At least, I don’t think I am generally speaking. And it’s really not their fault…it was a weird, freakish, hellish time for me, and they just had the misfortune of being there for it.

So, to contact, or not to contact? That is the question. Of course it may all be a moot point because I’ve already sent a note to one of them as I’m dying to know what’s been happening these last couple of decades, but…well…I guess we’ll see if the others catch on or not.

A pitfall of social networking sites for sure. I also find it difficult to believe that I’m the only one who has encountered this problem where, you’d like to fully put your past behind you…or your behind in your past (you say tomato…), but the Internet has made this all but impossible.

Anyone? Anyone? Bueller?

However, seeing as this election was really a historical event more so than any other election has been, I do feel the need to at least comment about that aspect of it.

Come January 20th, we will have our first black president.  This is freaking huge and I don’t think the importance of this can be overstated.  Americans have finally shown themselves to be, as a majority, past the racial issues that divided us as little as half a century ago.  That is a big, massive deal and it’s encouraging to see that.  I have heard some say that this will go a long way in improving the rest of the world’s opinion of us as well.  Cool.

I was also encouraged by the number of people who came out to vote.  Every election I feel like I hear the phrase “record voter turnout” – can someone quantify that for me?  Are we really making a new record with each passing election?  If that’s true, then perhaps we are on our way to having nearly every American over 18 voting.  Right on.

I’m a major advocate of voting.  I believe in the democratic system (although the whole electoral college thing escapes me) and I believe that you have no right complaining if you’re not willing to go out and make your voice heard when you have a chance.  I’m just saying.

Before I sign-off and try to get some work done, I just want to close with a comment to the Christians out there who are unhappy with the outcome of the election.  As a Christian myself, I believe that we are called to be respectful of anyone who is in a position of authority whether we agree with them or not.  God is sovereign and I truly believe that whoever is in office is the best man (or woman) for the job in God’s big, strategic picture.

To quote Romans 13:1 (I just love Romans):

“Let every person be subject to the governing authorities. For there is no authority except from God, and those that exist have been instituted by God.”

So no matter what your opinion is of Obama personally, he has been given this position by God and will need our prayers over his term in office.  He certainly will have my prayers as he takes on a job that carries more weight than I can imagine.

God Bless America!

Anyway, I wasn’t able to go to the Victory Parade, but my roommate Alyssa did and of course took pictures so here they are!

GO PHILS!

Ladies & gentlemen, I give you:

Autumn in Bucks County

But I digress…

In the midst of this cleaning frenzy, I came across some fun memorabilia – trinkets of the past, if you will – including (but not limited to):

• A photo taken of me & Jel the week I moved from Alaska – good times
• A coffee mug with the words “Safety First” from my trip to Thailand
• My last handwritten notebook journal and
• A bunch of “mix CDs” (which were post-mix tapes from high school, but pre-iPods & playlists).

Because music is a great thing to have on when you’re cleaning, or doing anything that keeps you from focusing on something steady like a TV screen, I popped in the CDs I’d found and let them play themselves silly.  I had no idea what was on them (I wasn’t much for labeling back in the late-90′s and early 2000′s when they were apparently made) and so I likewise had no idea what a ride I was in for.

I never cease to be amazed by the power that music has to evoke memories. Like smells, music can put me back in time and space to a particular place in an instant. As the CDs worked their way from beginning to end, I found myself completely transported – barely aware of the furniture, books, and boxes I was surrounded by.  I was at the mercy of the tunes.  The music had taken over.

Suddenly, I was…

• In the car with my sister (Jo) at Great Adventure in the safari, the giant head of a giraffe poking through the sunroof (Rusted Root – Send Me On My Way)
• Dancing in the snow with Jel at Beluga Point in the middle of the night (Depeche Mode – Personal Jesus)
• Working out at Dragon’s gym in Leamington Spa when I lived in the UK (Robbie Williams – Let Love Be Your Energy)
• Sailing through the Greek Isles in July 2001 (U2 – Beautiful Day)
• Camping with my sister outside of Denali National Park (Counting Crows – Round Here)
• Driving through Anchorage in the snow my first winter there (REM – Leave)
• In the beach bar on Relax Bay in Thailand (Dido – Here With Me)
• Hanging with my friends at the Willow Grove Mall in Junior High (Def Leppard – Pour Some Sugar On Me)
• Running around the reservoir with Jennifer in Central Park (U2 – Veritgo)
• Rockin’ out with Kristy in the car while driving around really cool places like Quakertown, Pennsburg, and East Greenville, PA (EMF – Unbelievable)
• Watching TV n the UK with Kristin when she came to visit (Element 4 – Big Brother Theme)
• Doin’ the dance with Jel in the car or at The Last Frontier…and most recently at her house in Edmonds (Will Smith – Men In Black)
• Seeing U2 in concert with Es in the post-9/11 “Elevation” tour (U2 – Elevation)
• On the Youth Group retreat up at Kutztown University, summer of 1989 (Cheap Trick – The Flame)
• Sailing in Thailand (Coldplay – Clocks)
• Seeing REM live from the front “row” in Seattle during the Bumbershoot Music Festival with Jel in 1999 (REM – Lotus)
• Hanging out in Memphis with Es (Live – Selling the Drama)
• On the Amtrak ride from Philly to Seattle when I moved up to Alaska in 1996 (REM – How The West Was Won & Where It Got Us)

I could go on and on and on.

In looking at that list, I can’t help but wonder where on earth the time goes.  Seriously – it just flies.  But that aside, I know that no matter what, I need to hang onto these CDs (or at least the playlists) so that when I’m old and gray and sitting in a retirement home somewhere, all I’ll need to do to relive the best moments of my life will be to play through one of these bad boys.  Pop in a CD (or put on a playlist) and my mind will be off and running.

Of course I’ve got a lot of years left and since I’m still collecting memories this way, I figure I’m going to have some crazy long-ass playlists by then…

Hopefully the technology will be able to keep up.

In case you’re interested, here is an interesting article I found which discusses music’s other superhero-like capabilities: http://www.livescience.com/health/081015-music-power.html

Apparently in addition to provoking memories, it can ease pain, influence mood, boost immunity, overcome fatigue, increase intelligence, reduce stress, anxiety, and depression…to name a few.  I don’t know if I can think of anything non-drug or alcohol-related that can claim all of that.

So what’s everyone waiting for?  Pump up the jam!

And on that last point, here are some pics I took today – I plan to take more, but thought this was a good start.  It’s by far one of the nicest things about living in the Northeast.

But that’s a topic for another post.  This post is about flooring.

If you’ve been reading my blog for awhile, you’ll be familiar with some of the drama that I’ve had to face being a homeowner.  This has included a rogue washing machine, appliance issues, and a suicidal heat pump.  Owning an older home typically also includes a vast wish list of improvements, enhancements, changes, or other adjustments either to make the home your own, or to at least bring it into the current decade.

My townhouse was built in 1987 when Cindi Lauper, Def Leppard, and sheet linoleum were all the rage.  Since moving in, I have repainted every wall (and I mean EVERY wall) of the house, I have put up new closet shelving, replaced appliances and the roof.  I painted the kitchen cabinets, put in a pantry, and even added built-in shelves (that I made myself, I might add) to the bathroom.  Still, these are all very minor compared to some of the items I still have on my to-do.

One of my dreams for my little space is to replace the floors.  As I discussed in my original Hopelessly Devoted to Hardwood post, replacing the pre-Deb carpet in the downstairs with hardwood was certainly at the top of my list and I am most happy to report that this week it has actually happened!

That’s right – hardwood floors now abound throughout my downstairs.  No more hidden dirt and grime.  No more haven for dust mites.  No more fearing what might lie in wait between the fibers of the nasty-ass carpet.  Swiffer is my new best friend.  The new floor starts at the door and carries through the powder room, entryway, and back through the dining & living rooms.  It looks fabulous.  It makes the whole downstairs feel bigger and lighter.  I couldn’t concentrate on the debate last night because I was so distracted by my floor’s beauty…and I can’t wait to get home tonight just to look at it some more.

Of course the staircase and the second floor are still carpeted, but that’s okay – it’s going to be replaced with better, clean, safer carpet.  Carpet that I wouldn’t be afraid to lie down on.

Naturally I’ll take pictures (or better yet, a video!) and post on here, but in the meantime I just wanted to share the joy.  The only thing outstanding now is the kitchen…  The floor was ripped up in there as well because it ran into the hallway, but is now just a mess of paper backing from the original linoleum.  It’s weird and rough and messy and smells funny.  I’m not sure I’ll be able to make it past the weekend with it like that…

Anyone interested in helping me tile?

Later that same day…

Look at my shiny new floors!

This is my world, and on this day where the Dow dropped 678 points, I just felt the need to vent a little, so here it is.

I have been in financial services for just over 11 years.  Not terribly long in the great scheme of things, but certainly it’s long enough.  Long enough to know what’s going on.  Long enough to be saddened by it.  Long enough to know that we’re headed into really dangerous waters…especially if the government keeps sticking its big, fat nose into places it doesn’t belong in the name of trying to “fix” it.  The fact is that government intervention is not the way out of this mess.  The government is not some sort of beacon in the night.  They are not – and cannot – be our savior although it seems they believe they’re up to the challenge.  Did I say “dangerous waters” before?  Perhaps “shark-infested” would be more appropriate.

So we have a market acting like it has bipolar disorder, an underlying real estate fall-out with unreal foreclosure rates and the banking industry has turned cannibalistic in order to avoid total failure.  In the past few weeks we have seen the collapse of companies with century-long track records and household names come crashing down (Bear Stearns, Lehman Brothers, and Merrill Lynch to name a few).  In my life and my 10 years at Merrill, I would never have expected that to happen…but who would?  Then again, we know this kind of thing can happen (can you say “Enron”?) so perhaps I shouldn’t be surprised, but I tend towards optimism.

Then as if all of this wasn’t enough, we have a presidential election in less than a month.  I don’t think they could have planned a worse time to be listening to politicians make empty promises.  While we’re trying to work through a major financial crisis, I come home to find my mailbox stuffed with direct mail campaign pieces (for Obama mostly) which surely couldn’t have been free to produce.  Is all that really necessary?  Even in watching the debate this week, I found myself getting frustrated.  At one point I wanted to scream at them, “Could you two just stop your pissing contest for two seconds and freakin’ LISTEN!”  Sorry – I don’t like politicians much…can you tell?  (As a sidenote on the election and politics, I found a really cool website resource called OpenSecrets.org – check it out).

Anyway, so there’s a lot going on.  It can seem overwhelming.  In fact, I’m sure it IS overwhelming for a lot of people.  A lot of people don’t really understand everything that’s happening in the markets – all they know is that their 401(k) is going down in value like a rock right now.  The sad thing is that ignorance is the mother of fear and fear’s best friend is rashness, and when money (or the loss thereof) is the reason for the fear, I think it shoots people into a whole ‘nother orbit of emotion.  I was watching Fox Business News tonight and they had a panel of financial experts with phone lines open.  One woman called in and said she had gotten so scared she sold all of her mutual funds today.  I cringed.  While I don’t want to be cavalier about people’s fear because it’s certainly real enough, if I’ve learned nothing else on Wall Street, it’s that when it comes to your investments, emotion has no place in your decision-making process.  Emotion will cloud your judgment and make you do things like sell all your investments at the bottom (or near bottom) of an already bad market.  I felt so sorry for that woman because I honestly believe selling everything was the wrong move.  Suffice it to say, I’m leaving my 401(k) alone.

In any case, there are lessons to be learned here for everyone – from John Doe to Congress.  Good ‘ol Johnny boy needs to learn how to better manage his personal finances (hey, maybe that Dave Ramsey guy knows what he’s talking about…go figure!)  And Congress?  Well, Congress needs to stop trying to act like a bunch of socialists…and that goes for our future president too – whoever he may be.

So that’s 2008…and it’s not over yet.  I’m not sure this is quite the way we would have WANTED to have the year remembered, but there it is.  The media is screaming (because that’s what they do) and the sky indeed may seem like it’s falling, but I’m not worried because at the end of the day, I know the One who is holding it up.

For now, I’m praying.  Praying for our government, for the election, and the economy.  Praying for sanity and for opportunities.  Most of all, I’ll be praying that one of the things we’ll all see is how unstable the world really is at its core, and therefore how foolish it is to put trust in it. Instead, we need to put our faith and trust on something solid, steady, and unchanging. We need to build our metaphorical houses on the Rock because there it doesn’t matter what winds may blow (or what markets may fall) – the Rock doesn’t move. And I wouldn’t want to be anywhere else in this storm.

“Therefore everyone who hears these words of mine and puts them into practice is like a wise man who built his house on the rock. The rain came down, the streams rose, and the winds blew and beat against that house; yet it did not fall, because it had its foundation on the rock.” (Matthew 7:23-25)

I can only assume that they were headed south and decided to make a pit-stop in my development.  Having been truly terrorized by an insanely loud bird who had decided to nest in a tree near her bedroom window this past spring, my roommate’s response when she saw the masses of winged beasts was one of minor terror.  She threatened to call an exterminator, if it came to that.  But I quickly reassured her since I was fairly certain they weren’t there to stay.

I managed to get them on video…sort of.  It was my cell phone so definitely not the best video capture (and certainly nothing to rivial the camera angles and genius of Hitchcock), but I think you’ll get the idea.  I managed to get some of them as they flew off which was pretty cool.

It has got to be the most birds I have ever seen at one time in my life.

Through work and on my own, I’ve been through multiple classes (including Myers-Briggs, DISC, and some others) and find that it helps me to understand other people as well as myself.

For those who may not be as familiar, ENFP (“The Inspirer”) actually stands for Extroverted Intuitive Feeling Perceiving. In essence, ENFPs are all over the map. Our interests are many and varied which I think helps us in being able to relate well to others because chances are there’s going to be some interest we have in common.

I think being a “people-person” predisposes me to interest in personality types and what they mean. Some shy away from personality tests because they prefer not to be “labeled” and that they’ve seen too many people use their personality types as an excuse for poor behavior.

Personally, I don’t find these to be valid reasons for personality test abstinence. A so-called “label” is whatever you make of it – just like stereotypes. For example, I’m blonde and while that may indeed subject me to some ridiculous stereotyping (“Why did the blonde get fired from the M&M factory?”), I’m not about to run out and dye my hair because of them. I also think that if someone is prone to making excuses for poor behavior, they’re not going to stop just because one of their excuses was taken away – they’ll just go out and find another one. But whatever.

I have been an ENFP my entire life…at least I suspect as much. I took my first Myers-Briggs test when I was about 12 as a result of my grandfather who used to insist that anyone entering the family take the test to see how their personality differed from their soon-to-be spouse (I think everyone came up as exact opposites which made me wonder if they hadn’t, would my grandfather have refused to let them marry?) Anyway, I came out an ENFP. I took the test again at 18, 22, 25, and 30. Each test still showed me as an ENFP, although I watched the scores for each letter grow over time so that rather than slowly becoming more “balanced” between each type indicator as some do, I actually became a stronger ENFP. Today I am a more-or-less textbook case – perhaps I should be studied.

Some of what you can learn about yourself can have you feeling pretty good (e.g. ENFPs are warm, enthusiastic people, typically very bright and full of potential.*) Other things you get to learn about are your weaknesses (e.g. ENFPs sometimes make serious errors in judgment. They have an amazing ability to intuitively perceive the truth about a person or situation, but when they apply judgment to their perception, they may jump to the wrong conclusions.*) Hm. Something to work on.

One thing I’ve learned is that, unlike most Extroverted types, my specific combination needs some alone time. This was a relief to discover this after recognizing my desire to sometimes say “no” to going out with people which I thought was supposedly contrary to how extroverts in general behaved. I have also found on vacations that my limit for spending non-stop time with others is roughly 9 days. For instance, on my Thailand sailing trip with 14 other people on 2 relatively small boats, I got up 9 days into the trip, grabbed my iPod, and sat on the bow of the boat for several hours alone that morning without speaking to anyone. I needed that time to get myself recharged and centered – it felt great.

However, I think that results from things like Myers-Briggs or DISC are pretty useless if you aren’t given the direction or tools to know what to do with the information once you have it. At Merrill Lynch, they employed psychologists who conducted team-building workshops which were great. There are other tools and coaches out there who use them to help you discern what career path (or new career) might be a good fit. This is one of the things I’ve used it for – to help give me ideas about where I might want to focus my attentions in the future.

Should I go back to school and become a brain surgeon, or should I consider getting a job at SeaWorld feeding the dolphins?  Perhaps I’ve missed my calling as a professional glassblower, or maybe I should go back to being a waitress.  Maybe I would really blossom in the paint-color naming department of Sherwin Williams, or do I stick with my current role as a Project Manager for the rest of my working life?

I actually think I will always be a project manager whether in my current capacity or not.  Life is full of “projects” (a.k.a. things we have to complete from start to finish) and since ENFPs get bored easily and therefore are generally not good at follow-through, being a project manager now I’m finding is a great help in training myself to finish something I start. That’s great, but the question still remains – What is around the next bend on my Yellow Brick Career Path?  If only I had a periscope to see.

So anyone else want to share their 4-letter code?  No stereotypes – I promise.

* All quotes referencing the ENFP MBTI® personality type are taken from the BSM Consulting website (http://www.personalitypage.com/ENFP.html)

Okay, first and foremost, I want it to be clear that I did NOT go to see this film because it was some sort of Christian movie.  In fact, I had no idea that it was until after it started, but I’m getting ahead of myself.

Around 10 o’clock this morning, I got a call from my grandmother asking me if I’d like to go to the movies with her.  She said she never goes anymore, and that there was some new film out she wanted to see called Fireproof .  I agreed, of course (who among us could say “no” to their grandmother?) and looked up the times for the nearest theater on Fandango and we decided to catch an afternoon showing.

As for the film, Fandango didn’t have much to say about it, and I knew nothing.  Being a Dave Ramsey budgeter, I hardly ever go out to the movies anymore and then being a Tivo owner, I no longer watch commercials so had not seen any trailers.  So in essence, I was a totally blank slate going into this with no preconceived ideas or expectations of any kind.

The story centers around a firefighter named Caleb Holt (Kirk Cameron) and his wife, Catherine (Erin Bethea), whose marriage is on full-speed towards a divorce until Caleb’s father challenges him to hold-off on proceedings while he completes a 40-day “love dare.”  Caleb reluctantly agrees, but finds it increasingly difficult as his wife appears to slip further away as a doctor at the hospital where she works begins to vie for her affections.  Caleb presses on, however, encouraged by his father and a fellow firefighter and eventually the story meets its inevitable happy ending.  The film is supported by some good comic relief in parts, and a decent score as well.

My first thought was that the people on screen (with the exception of Kirk Cameron) really couldn’t act very well.  Then I started to see the major Christian references and quickly picked up on what kind of movie this was.  Suddenly my grandmother’s interest in this film made a lot more sense.

Great, I thought, I’ve just unknowingly signed up to watch some sort of weird, cheesy, God-flick.  Flashbacks of elementary school visits to “The Christian Cinema” in Ambler flooded over me coupled with the time I rented Left Behind (admittedly not one of my better movie choices).  I sighed inwardly and decided to just relax and see if I can’t at least enjoy some aspect of it.  At the very least, it would be kinda fun to see one of my favorite junior high crushes on the big screen for the first time since LIke Father, Like Son in 1987.

To my near-complete surprise, I found myself enjoying the film.  The acting which at first seemed contrived, actually got better as the movie progressed…or I just stopped noticing that it was poor (which is probably more likely).  I liked the characters with the exception of the doctor (whose only real contribution seemed to be that of the worst acting overall) but really found myself hoping for the happy ending.

Acting aside, my main criticism of the movie would be that it went on long after what I would have thought to be the natural end.  I understand what they were trying to communicate in that excess time, but really feel it was unnecessary.  The writers could’ve given the audience a little more credit to infer the rest themselves.

My other criticism isn’t so much specific to this movie in particular, but to these so-called “religious message” films as a whole.  I appreciate whole-heartedly what they are trying to accomplish – and indeed I would love to incorporate “The Love Dare” as part of my marriage (should I ever have one someday) but I just don’t understand why Christians feel the need to be so insanely blatant in their storytelling that they end up painting themselves into a niche corner and risk potentially turning off those they most are attempting to reach.

I’m not saying that as Christians we shouldn’t be upfront about Jesus and our faith in Him.  Not at all.  But I think that if people feel like they’re being preached to when they haven’t gone voluntarily into a church, we may not really have the impact we’re trying to.  However, if we were to just put down the Bible-shaped bat some use to beat the world over the head with and instead just show others Jesus by loving them right where they are, the results just might be surprising.

I don’t want to be too hard on Fireproof – I basically really liked it…it’s a sweet love story and I would recommended it for anyone who is in a relationship, ever has been in a relationship, or ever thinks that they may one day be in a relationship.  All I’m saying is that I think it may have drawn in a wider audience if they had spent a little more energy on character development and let the story of love, humility, sacrifice, service, forgiveness, and redemption speak for itself.  All of these things are amazingly attractive even without being framed within a full-out alter call because they are all attributes and side-effects of knowing and loving our God.  If we show the world these in our everyday lives – from the way we treat each other to the way we approach difficult situations – then we’re showing the world Jesus whether they recognize it or not, and then watch them come looking for more.

But maybe that’s just me, so take it with a grain of salt (or pepper, if you prefer), but Christian or not, I still would say go see this movie.  The story really does stand on its own; and the underlying message of love being a choice backed-up (and at times made possible) through action rather than simply feelings-based is a strong, solid one worth the time and money.

Just for fun, I’ll leave you with a link to what the New York TImes reviewer had to say about it – always good to get that objective third-partier’s 2 cents…

FIreproof: Putting Out Housefires, Reigniting Passions by Neil Genzlinger

Some of my control freak tendencies as a younger me stemmed from trying to figure out how to survive in the “real world”.  Prior to leaving my parents house, there wasn’t much I had to worry about, so I think I had more time and energy to spend being controlling about stupid things in life like the organization of my CDs.

Once I got out on my own, suddenly there were more real concerns…and these were concerns I had to face not as part of a newly married couple (as so many of my friends were), but as a single 22-year-old with no clue.  I was plagued with questions like: How do I get my utilities turned on for my new apartment?  Where’s the nearest laundromat?  What do you cook with when you have no money to buy pots & pans?  Can the human body truly subsist on mac & cheese alone?

Initially, I was also still concerned with the mundane issues like having my CDs in alphabetical order by artist, but the more busy I got with attending to the bigger picture, the more those cares and tendencies towards trying to control the little things slip away.  Today, my CDs are still more-or-less arranged by artist, but are not alphabetical and are spread across at least 5 different locations in my home so if you’re looking for a particular CD, good luck because unless it’s U2, I probably can’t tell you where it is.

I think if I were a true Type-A individual (which, as we all know is just a nice way of saying “control freak”), something like coming over and messing with my kitchen drawers or cabinets, would totally rock my world.  However, I can say with a pretty high degree of confidence that you could go ahead and do this and I wouldn’t really care.  This is not to say that I don’t try to keep my kitchen organized – I do, but not because I feel the need to be in control of my kitchen.  Rather, I just think it’s easier when all the pots, plates, glasses, and bowls are with more of their own kind.  Call me crazy, but I like not having to hunt for lids to my Tupperware. I’m also somewhat limited in cabinet space, so things have to remain somewhat organized or else it wouldn’t all fit.  Actually, the more I write about this, the more I realize that my kitchen may not really be the best illustration.

Let’s try the pantry instead.

My pantry is a crazy, assorted array of dry food and spices.  There is pasta, cans of soup, cereal, boxes of 100 Calorie packs, pudding, taco seasoning packets, and God-knows-what-else. The only things remotely organized about it are that the spices are all together on a rack and I think that the cereal is more or less on the same shelf.  That’s it.  My pantry is definitely NOT the pantry of a control freak.  Monica Geller would probably need to be hospitalized if she saw it.  My pantry is more representative of my approach to life than any other part of my house:  As long as I can find things and nothing is in danger of falling off the shelf, I’m good.

The problem with this approach to life is that it may work for my pantry, but doesn’t really fly when you’re trying to do things like a budget.  Until I started the Dave Ramsey plan in February, I’d go literally years without balancing my checkbook.  My sister would say she couldn’t understand how I could NOT balance my checkbook and I would try to explain to her how it was just one of those things I found tiresome and tedious and really not all that important.  I realize now that, while still tiresome and tedious, the balancing of the checkbook is actually very important.  Essential even.  Being on a budget and along the path to becoming debt free has forced me into a behavior pattern that does not come naturally to me – surprisingly I’m pretty good at it, but that doesn’t make it easy.  Needless to say, this has been a difficult albeit necessary shift for me.

Dave Ramsey calls people like me a “Free Spirit” (read: non-control freak) which is essentially the antithesis of what he calls a “Nerd” (read: control freak).  Marriages, he says, are generally made up with one of each.  As a Free Spirit single, having to take on Nerd activities is a real challenge for sure, but where I’m finding myself struggle the most these days is in keeping up my motivation. 9-months into my debt-free path, my interest is waning.  It was easy enough when I first started out and kicked some major debt-ass with my year-end bonus and tax refund, but the day-to-day grind is what’s bringing me down.  My monthly committee meetings with my budget accountability partner (Shanna) is a great help.  She gives me some much needed “Atta-girls” and reminds me to look at how far I’ve come since the starting point, not get caught up in how far away the finish line feels (“Are we there yet, Papa Smurf?”)

So Shanna helps.  Reading through old posts from when I first started my budget also helps.  But what I’m really getting excited about is what the next few months hold.  There are some things coming up which I feel will give me a much-needed ‘Matt Foley‘ motivational speech…and not a moment too soon.

First is a one-day seminar on Personal Finance we’re holding at The Well in November followed by a full run of Financial Peace University which we’re starting in February 2009.  In general I find there is nothing like feeding off the inspiration that comes from being surrounded by others on the same journey…

Additionally I know that as I get more involved in this area, I will be able to help encourage and support others which I think is the best form of motivation there is…  Well, that and not waiting to end up living in a van down by the river.