Still no word…in fact, I haven’t heard anything at all in two days. I’m trying very hard to not feel discouraged, but it’s difficult and I feel discouraged anyway. Especially today for some reason. Maybe it’s hormonal…who knows. I was hopefully going to have an interview tonight over the phone with this company (Temenos). Online they look like a fantastic company. The HR manager was supposed to call by 7:30pm ET, but she hasn’t yet and I kind of don’t expect her to at this point.
I’m a little sad today…I don’t know if it’s because my leaving is starting to really sink in a little. Julie & Fred took off today for Sweden. When we said goodbye yesterday, I didn’t really feel like it was goodbye. However, today when I got home, I felt it a little more…like when I remembered Julie wasn’t home and so I couldn’t call her. Robert and I were talking about it today as well…just feeling like I’m not really going anywhere. I think in part it’s due to the fact that I’m so preoccupied with trying to get my plans sorted out. I want to cry, but I can’t even seem to do that!
I get so tired of being alone. I want to have someone to spend my life with…someone to go through this kind of stuff with…someone to share all my thoughts and feelings with…someone to hug. Julie said yesterday, “I wish I had hugged you more.” I wish she had too.
I’m excited to get back to America though! I can’t wait to be around all the things I know and love and have missed this past year. It’s true that I’ve come to love and appreciate things here in the UK, but it still isn’t really “home” in the same way the US is…and I want to go home.
Right now I need to go to bed though. The HR chick is apparently not going to be calling tonight.
